12 Dos and Don'ts on a Death

بسم الله والحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله

When a person passes away, there are a number of actions that we should do as relatives, friends and Muslim brethren/sisters. There are also a number of actions found within our communities/cultures which have been expressly forbidden that must be avoided. Here are a list of 12 such dos and don'ts on a death:

1. DO pray Janâzah Salâh upon the deceased

"No Muslim dies and a group of people whose number reaches one hundred offers the funeral prayer for him, interceding for him, but their intercession for him will be accepted." 1

"If three rows of men offer funeral prayer over anyone, his entry into Jannah (Paradise) will become certain." 2

"Any Muslim dies and forty men who do not associate anything with Allah (in worship), perform his funeral prayer, Allah makes them intercede for him" 3

2. DO follow the bier

"Whoever attends the funeral procession till he offers the funeral prayer for it, will get a reward equal to one Qirat, and whoever accompanies it till burial, will get a reward equal to two Qirats." It was asked, "What are two Qirats?" He replied, "Like two huge mountains." 4

3. DO bury the deceased quickly

"Hasten with the Janâzah (dead body), for if it was righteous then you are taking it toward something good, and if it was otherwise, then it is an evil of which you are relieving yourselves." 5

"Three are not to be delayed: Salâh (prayer) when its time comes, a funeral (bier) when it is presented, and the (marriage of a) single woman when there is an equal (match) for her." 6

4. DO visit graves

"I forbade you to visit graves, but you may now visit them" 7

"Visit the graves, for that makes you mindful of death" 8

5. DO send reward

"The mother of Sa`d bin 'Ubada died in his absence. He said, "O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)! My mother died in my absence; will it be of any benefit for her if I give Sadaqah (charity) on her behalf?" The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Yes," 9

A woman's mother had died... "She (again) said: She did not perform Hajj, should I perform it on her behalf? He (the Holy Prophet ﷺ) said: Perform Hajj on her behalf." 10

6. DO console relatives

"Whoever consoles a person with an affliction, then he gets the same reward as him." 11

"Whoever consoles a bereaved mother, he will be clothed with a cloak (garment) in Paradise." 12

"There is no believer who consoles his brother (who is) afflicted with a calamity, but Allâh [Glory be to Him] will clothe him with garments of honour on the Day of Resurrection." 13

7. DO fulfil bequest

If the bequest is valid (i.e. not to heirs, up to one third), then it should be complied with, especially if there are outstanding obligations such as Hajj, Zakâh, etc.

"...after any bequest which was made or debt..." 14

8. DO distribute inheritance

It is important that the inheritance is distributed according to shares fixed by the Almighty:

"Your parents or your children - you know not which of them are nearest to you in benefit. [These shares are] an obligation [imposed] by Allâh" 15

"These are the limits [set by] Allâh, and whoever obeys Allâh and His Messenger will be admitted by Him to gardens [in Paradise] under which rivers flow, abiding eternally therein; and that is the great attainment. And whoever disobeys Allâh and His Messenger and transgresses His limits - He will put him into the Fire to abide eternally therein, and he will have a humiliating punishment." 16

9. DO settle debts

These must be settled before the inheritance:

"...after any bequest which was made or debt..." 14

If the deceased left behind wealth or property to cover his debts, his heirs should clear his debts:

"A dead man in debt used to be brought to Allâh's Messenger (ﷺ) who would ask, "Has he left anything to re pay his debts?" If he was informed that he had left something to cover his debts the Prophet (ﷺ) would offer the funeral prayer for him; otherwise he would say to the Muslims present there, "Offer the funeral prayer for your friend", but when Allâh helped the Prophet (ﷺ) to gain victory (on his expeditions), he said, "I am closer to the Believers than themselves, so if one of the Believers dies in debt, I will repay it, but if he leaves wealth, it will be for his heirs." 17

10. Widows MUST perform 'Iddah

"And those who are taken in death among you and leave wives behind - they, [the wives, shall] wait four months and ten [days]" 18

11. DO NOT Wail/Scream

"The deceased is tortured in his grave for the wailing done over him" 19

"Two (things) are found among men which are tantamount to unbelief: slandering one's lineage and lamentation on the dead" 20

12. DO NOT hold innovated customs

Some examples of innovated customs are:

• Khatmul-Qur-ân (also known as "khatam", "fatiha" or "Quran khani") - the completion of the Qur-ân as a custom on specific days in a specific manner in a gathering is an innovation21 22. If done individually without compulsion and no conditions attached, then it is desirable (see no. 5)
• Teesra/Tija, Daswa, Chehlum, Barsi, etc. (commemoration of the 3rd, 10th, 40th days or anniversary) with feasts (and/or “khatam”) - this is baseless and a clear innovation21
• Flowers at the grave - has no basis; none of the pious practised upon this.23 A small twig/branch may be permissible if it's not done as a custom
• Athân at the grave - a completely baseless act and an obvious innovation24
• Chadar poshi (covering the grave with a cloth) - also an innovation and impermissible25
• Similarly, any other custom which people attach importance or extra reward to or regard as compulsory are innovations26 27

These innovated practices have no basis in the Deen (religion) and must be abandoned. The Deen is complete and does not need additions:

"This day I have perfected for you your religion and completed My favour upon you and have chosen for you Islam as your religion." 28

If someone does introduce innovations, it will be rejected:

"Whoever introduces into this matter of ours that which does not belong to it, will have it rejected." 29

In fact, it is clear misguidance and leads to the Fire:

"And beware of the newly-introduced matters, for every newly-introduced matter is an innovation, and every innovation is misguidance" 30

"Indeed, the best speech is the Book of Allâh and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad (ﷺ) and the worst of affairs are the newly-invented matters, every newly-invented matter is an innovation and every innovation is misguidance (going astray), and every misguidance is in the Fire" 31

Anyone introducing innovations shall also receive the sins of those who act upon his misguidance:

"And whoever introduces an erroneous innovation which Allâh is not pleased with, nor His Messenger (ﷺ), then he shall receive sins similar to whoever acts upon it, without that diminishing anything from the sins of the people" 32

therefore innovations (bid'ât) should be shunned on all occasions. We should be satisfied and pleased with the Sunnah for practice and guidance.

May Allâh enable us to act upon the Sunnah and leave innovations and misguidance.

And Allâh Knows Best
Abu Yousuf

• 1. لاَ يَمُوتُ أَحَدٌ مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ فَيُصَلِّي عَلَيْهِ أُمَّةٌ مِنَ النَّاسِ فَيَبْلُغُوا أَنْ يَكُونُوا مِائَةً فَيَشْفَعُوا إِلاَّ شُفِّعُوا فِيهِ (Sunan an-Nasa'i)
• 2. من صلى عليه ثلاثة صفوف، فقد أوجب (Abu Dawud, At- Tirmidhi)
• 3. ما من رجل مسلم يموت فيقوم على جنازته أربعون رجلاً لا يشركون بالله شيئاً إلا شفعهم الله فيه (Muslim)
• 4. مَنْ شَهِدَ الْجَنَازَةَ حَتَّى يُصَلِّيَ عَلَيْهَا فَلَهُ قِيرَاطٌ، وَمَنْ شَهِدَ حَتَّى تُدْفَنَ كَانَ لَهُ قِيرَاطَانِ ‏"‏‏.‏ قِيلَ وَمَا الْقِيرَاطَانِ قَالَ ‏"‏ مِثْلُ الْجَبَلَيْنِ الْعَظِيمَيْنِ "‏ (Bukhari, Muslim, an-Nasa'i)
• 5. أَسْرِعُوا بِالْجَنَازَةِ, فَإِنْ تَكُ صَالِحَةً فَخَيْرٌ تُقَدِّمُونَهَا إِلَيْهِ, وَإِنْ تَكُ سِوَى ذَلِكَ فَشَرٌّ تَضَعُونَهُ عَنْ رِقَابِكُمْ‏ (al-Bukhari, Muslim, an-Nasa'i)
• 6. ثَلاَثٌ لاَ تُؤَخِّرْهَا الصَّلاَةُ إِذَا آنَتْ وَالْجَنَازَةُ إِذَا حَضَرَتْ وَالأَيِّمُ إِذَا وَجَدْتَ لَهَا كُفْؤًا (at-Tirmidhi)
• 7. نَهَيْتُكُمْ عَنْ زِيَارَةِ الْقُبُورِ فَزُورُوهَا (Muslim, Muwatta Malik, an-Nasa'i, Abu Dawud, At-Tirmidhi, ibn Majah)
• 8. فَزُورُوا الْقُبُورَ فَإِنَّهَا تُذَكِّرُ الْمَوْتَ (Muslim, an-Nasa'i, at-Tirmidhi, ibn Majah)
• 9. أَنَّ سَعْدَ بْنَ عُبَادَةَ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ تُوُفِّيَتْ أُمُّهُ وَهْوَ غَائِبٌ عَنْهَا، فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنَّ أُمِّي تُوُفِّيَتْ وَأَنَا غَائِبٌ عَنْهَا، أَيَنْفَعُهَا شَىْءٌ إِنْ تَصَدَّقْتُ بِهِ عَنْهَا قَالَ ‏ "‏ نَعَمْ ‏" (al-Bukhari, an-Nasa'i, Abu Dawud)
• 10. [...] قَالَتْ إِنَّهَا لَمْ تَحُجَّ قَطُّ أَفَأَحُجُّ عَنْهَا قَالَ ‏"‏ حُجِّي عَنْهَا "‏" (Muslim, at-Tirmidhi)
• 11. مَنْ عَزَّى مُصَابًا فَلَهُ مِثْلُ أَجْرِهِ (at-Tirmidhi, ibn Majah)
• 12. مَنْ عَزَّى ثَكْلَى كُسِيَ بُرْدًا فِي الْجَنَّةِ (at-Tirmidhi)
• 13. مَا مِنْ مُؤْمِنٍ يُعَزِّي أَخَاهُ بِمُصِيبَةٍ إِلاَّ كَسَاهُ اللَّهُ سُبْحَانَهُ مِنْ حُلَلِ الْكَرَامَةِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ (ibn Majah)
• 14. a. b. من بعد وصية يوصىٰ بها أو دين... (Qur-ân 4:12)
• 15. اٰباؤكم وأبناؤكم لا تدرون أيهم أقرب لكم نفعا فريضة من الله (Qur-ân 4:11)
• 16. تلك حدود الله ومن يطع الله ورسوله يدخله جنٰت تجرى من تحتها الأنهٰر خٰلدين فيها وذٰلك الفوز العظيم . ومن يعص الله ورسوله ويتعد حدوده يدخله نارا خٰلدا فيها وله عذاب مهين (Qur-ân 4:13-14)
• 17. أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم كَانَ يُؤْتَى بِالرَّجُلِ الْمُتَوَفَّى عَلَيْهِ الدَّيْنُ، فَيَسْأَلُ ‏"‏ هَلْ تَرَكَ لِدَيْنِهِ فَضْلاً ‏"‏‏.‏ فَإِنْ حُدِّثَ أَنَّهُ تَرَكَ وَفَاءً صَلَّى، وَإِلاَّ قَالَ لِلْمُسْلِمِينَ ‏"‏ صَلُّوا عَلَى صَاحِبِكُمْ ‏"‏‏.‏ فَلَمَّا فَتَحَ اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ الْفُتُوحَ قَالَ ‏"‏ أَنَا أَوْلَى بِالْمُؤْمِنِينَ مِنْ أَنْفُسِهِمْ، فَمَنْ تُوُفِّيَ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ فَتَرَكَ دَيْنًا فَعَلَىَّ قَضَاؤُهُ، وَمَنْ تَرَكَ مَالاً فَلِوَرَثَتِهِ... (al-Bukhari, Muslim, at-Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, an-Nasa'i, ibn Majah with variations in wording)
• 18. والذين يتوفون منكم ويذرون أزوٰجا يتربصن بأنفسهن أربعة أشهر وعشرا (Qur-ân 2:234)
• 19. الْمَيِّتُ يُعَذَّبُ فِي قَبْرِهِ بِمَا نِيحَ عَلَيْهِ (al-Bukhari, Muslim, an-Nasa'i, ibn Majah)
• 20. اثْنَتَانِ فِي النَّاسِ هُمَا بِهِمْ كُفْرٌ الطَّعْنُ فِي النَّسَبِ وَالنِّيَاحَةُ عَلَى الْمَيِّتِ (Muslim)
• 21. a. b. مَطْلَبٌ فِي كَرَاهَةِ الضِّيَافَةِ مِنْ أَهْلِ الْمَيِّتِ وَقَالَ أَيْضًا : وَيُكْرَهُ اتِّخَاذُ الضِّيَافَةِ مِنْ الطَّعَامِ مِنْ أَهْلِ الْمَيِّتِ لِأَنَّهُ شُرِعَ فِي السُّرُورِ لَا فِي الشُّرُورِ ، وَهِيَ بِدْعَةٌ مُسْتَقْبَحَةٌ : وَرَوَى الْإِمَامُ أَحْمَدُ وَابْنُ مَاجَهْ بِإِسْنَادٍ صَحِيحٍ عَنْ جَرِيرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ قَالَ " كُنَّا نَعُدُّ الِاجْتِمَاعَ إلَى أَهْلِ الْمَيِّتِ وَصُنْعَهُمْ الطَّعَامَ مِنْ النِّيَاحَةِ " . ا هـ . وَفِي الْبَزَّازِيَّةِ : وَيُكْرَهُ اتِّخَاذُ الطَّعَامِ فِي الْيَوْمِ الْأَوَّلِ وَالثَّالِثِ وَبَعْدَ الْأُسْبُوعِ وَنَقْلُ الطَّعَامِ إلَى الْقَبْرِ فِي الْمَوَاسِمِ ، وَاِتِّخَاذُ الدَّعْوَةِ لِقِرَاءَةِ الْقُرْآنِ وَجَمْعُ الصُّلَحَاءِ وَالْقُرَّاءِ لِلْخَتْمِ أَوْ لِقِرَاءَةِ سُورَةِ الْأَنْعَامِ أَوْ الْإِخْلَاصِ . وَالْحَاصِلُ أَنَّ اتِّخَاذَ الطَّعَامِ عِنْدَ قِرَاءَةِ الْقُرْآنِ لِأَجْلِ الْأَكْلِ يُكْرَهُ (Radd al-Muhtar 1/240)
• 22. Fatawa Mahmoodiyah 3/60-100
• 23. Ahsanul Fatawa 1/374
• 24. Ahsanul Fatawa 1/337
• 25. Ahsanul Fatawa 1/376
• 26. ( ومبتدع ) أي صاحب بدعة وهي اعتقاد خلاف المعروف عن الرسول لا بمعاندة بل بنوع شبهة (Durr al-Mukhtar)
• 27. مَا أُحْدِثَ عَلَى خِلَافِ الْحَقِّ الْمُتَلَقَّى عَنْ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مِنْ عِلْمٍ أَوْ عَمَلٍ أَوْ حَالٍ بِنَوْعِ شُبْهَةٍ وَاسْتِحْسَانٍ ، وَجُعِلَ دَيْنًا قَوِيمًا وَصِرَاطًا مُسْتَقِيمًا (Radd al-Muhtar 1/560)
• 28. الْيَوْمَ أَكْمَلْتُ لَكُمْ دِينَكُمْ وَأَتْمَمْتُ عَلَيْكُمْ نِعْمَتِي وَرَضِيتُ لَكُمُ الإِسْلاَمَ دِينًا (Qur-ân 5:3)
• 29. مَنْ أَحْدَثَ فِي أَمْرِنَا هَذَا مَا لَيْسَ مِنْهُ فَهُوَ رَدٌ (al-Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud)
• 30. وَإِيَّاكُمْ وَمُحْدَثَاتِ الأُمُورِ فَإِنَّ كُلَّ مُحْدَثَةٍ بِدْعَةٌ وَكُلَّ بِدْعَةٍ ضَلاَلَةٌ (Abu Dawud, at-Tirmidhi, ibn Majah)
• 31. إِنَّ أَصْدَقَ الْحَدِيثِ كِتَابُ اللَّهِ وَأَحْسَنَ الْهَدْىِ هَدْىُ مُحَمَّدٍ وَشَرَّ الأُمُورِ مُحْدَثَاتُهَا وَكُلَّ مُحْدَثَةٍ بِدْعَةٌ وَكُلَّ بِدْعَةٍ ضَلاَلَةٌ وَكُلَّ ضَلاَلَةٍ فِي النَّارِ (an-Nasa'i. Muslim and ibn Majah with different wording)
• 32. مَنِ ابْتَدَعَ بِدْعَةَ ضَلاَلَةٍ لاَ يَرْضَاهَا اللَّهُ وَرَسُولُهُ كَانَ عَلَيْهِ مِثْلُ آثَامِ مَنْ عَمِلَ بِهَا لاَ يَنْقُصُ ذَلِكَ مِنْ أَوْزَارِ النَّاسِ شَيْئًا (at-Tirmidhi, ibn Majah)